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Destroy Furniture For Food Disclaimer: Please note that the opinions that Charly expresses in this editorial are entirely his own and don't necessarily reflect the views or opinons of anyone on the XROXX Staff. Most likely you will be dissed and offended after reading this article - don't worry, we were too! So, read at your own risk! In the best interests of the First Amendment, we decided to post this article and let you decide for yourself - the way it should be. Hello to all. I believe it's been a month or two since I last updated this weekly column. My bad. Sorry to the three or four of you that actually read it. I've been extremely busy getting dumped, way too shit-faced, having some close calls with the Somerset, WI police force, and working. So, here are some random things I've been thinking about or doing the last month or so: The 2004 Election
Vicodin Anyone? For all of those recovering drug addicts out there, I recommend getting your wisdom teeth pulled. I’m hopped up on a couple great dental drugs as I write this and I admit, I’m loving it! I’ve been floating and sleeping the last couple of days now. So, if you’re not into drugs anymore, but you wish you had something like it, go to the dentist and get those suckers pulled... Stay In School Kids! The Show Must Go On, Part 1 The Show Must Go On, Part 2 I have nothing more to say right now. Again, sorry for my slump with writing this article and sorry for all of these random thoughts bundled up in to one article. I guess that’s what happens when I try to write an article under the influence of several neato painkillers. Cheerio. Oh, I almost forgot to mention. I recently became a real ordained minister online! I have no belief in a heaven or hell, but if for some strange reason there is a God and a heaven/hell, I’ve pretty much got a one trip ticket to hell now. So, before I spend all eternity with the likes of Adolf Hitler and Ronald Reagan, I am free to do weddings, funerals, baptisms, etc., LEGALLY. So, if you’re in the Twin Cities area and you need a minister for anything, contact me. Ha ha ha ha. Hey!! Wanna bitch at me or tell you how great you think I am? Throw down on my message board suckaz: http://www.xroxx.com/mboard/viewforum.php?f=8 Rev. Charly Hogeboom Go Back. |
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Hey, you little blue state, whiny bitches, shut the fuck up already. I admit, my vote went to Kerry, but it's not like Kerry winning the election would have saved the world. Kerry was a lying douche bag and I believe regardless who wins in this two party system that we are all fucked. Maybe not in the near future, but America's going to hell. History repeats itself and all great empires that rule the world eventually collapse. Maybe we won't even live to see it, but we're fucked. We are all ready on our way down and no matter who won the election, nothing will stop us. Bush is just pushing us down a little faster...
I don’t know if any of you young guns that read and write for XROXX know how the real, working world works, being in junior high and all, but I must say it fucking sucks. For the last two months I was working full-time in a factory/lab being the bitch for a big-ass company that doesn’t pay the shit-workers enough. It was my first real taste of what the majority of the rest of my useless life will be like. N o one deserves being a legal slave like that, so I quit and now am able to watch “Saved By The Bell” everyday. So, I recommend to not dick around in high school and work to get in to college. High school to me was a big joke and now all I have to look forward to everyday is the hi-jinks of Zach and Slater and the most beautiful girl in all of Bayside, Kelly. (Note: To anyone who is going through the same problem with a shit-job, check out the book Rivethead by Ben Hamper. Good read.) 
I witnessed two great shows last week. The first was Bad Religion, Rise Against, and From First To Last at The Quest. From First To Last seemed like one of the bands I could have ripped on hardcore in my “Neo-Punk Fashions” article. Too bad I didn’t have the pleasure of hearing these talent-less jerks earlier. Whoever invited them on this tour should be shot. I encountered about seven people there that actually enjoyed them. Rise Against still puts on a kick-ass show, but there is nothing sadder to witness than someone motioning to the audience several times to start a circle pit and no one listens. Too bad everyone’s main agenda at shows these days is looking cool to the morons around them and not enjoying themselves. When Bad Religion finally came on I almost creamed my jeans. They played an abundance of new songs and all the old classics: “Atomic Garden,” “Do What You Want,” “Recipe For Hate,” “We’re Only Gonna Die,” “You,” and a shit load more. Bad Religion remains one of the best live bands I’ve ever seen. Too bad anyone one of them is old enough to be my dad...
Just three days after the orgasmic Bad Religion show I saw Green Day live at the Target Center; home of the Minnesota Timberwolves, which is a horrible, horrible place to witness a show. Anyways, I’ve had a soft spot in my heart for Green Day ever since I saw the “Basket Case” video ten years ago. They were the first band I saw live (the 6th grade!), they were the first band I listened to and actually liked, and they inspired me to learn how to play the guitar, dye my hair, and be a little bastard throughout junior high school. After all of these years, Green Day still put on one of the best live shows I’ve ever seen. They played a lot of new material, including the whole “Jesus Of Suburbia” and they played a lot of the stuff from International Superhits. They played for almost two hours and the biggest highlights were: Billie bringing people up on stage to finish off “Knowledge” by Operation Ivy, Billie jumping on top of me, the band playing “King For A Day” with the horns and everything, and playing Queen’s “We Are The Champions” for an encore. Plus, Jason White from The Influents and Pinhead Gunpowder played a solid second guitar most of the show that made Green Day that much more powerful. This was definitely a kick-ass show; the only show worth the 35 fucking dollars I paid for it. So, if Green Day is coming to your town, try to catch them. Y ou won’t regret it. ( Notice, I didn’t even take the time to rip on Sugarcunt or New Found Glory...)